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Showing posts with label radio. Show all posts
Showing posts with label radio. Show all posts
Saturday, January 10, 2009
Saturday, September 30, 2006
Friggin' Events
My day, in review:
I was planning on actually getting some stuff done tonight, but now I think I'll just go to bed and hope that none of this really happened.
- 11:00 AM:Wake up after long night of planning for my radio show. (Yes, despite popular belief, I actually do plan it.) Find myself confronted by even more planning. I hate having a four-hour slot.
- 12:15 PM: After the usual morning routines, turn on radio to find out that I've missed out on a rare appearance of The Disco Desperado.
- 12:30 - 3:30 PM: Finish preparing for show, wrestle with Windows while getting files transferred to laptop.
- 3:45 PM: Leave for station.
- 3:51 PM: Car stalls out on Birney Ave. Manage to get it halfway pulled into Turkey Hill entrance. Thankfully, someone pulling in stops and helps me push it into the parking lot. He spent some time cursing fuel injection and the way everything on a car is run by computer today. After my experiences, I would have to agree.
- 3:55 PM: After fumbling through my backpack, realize that my cell phone, which I rarely use and had gotten specifically for this purpose, was in my jacket.
Which was, of course, at home. - 3:56 PM: Asked Turkey Hill cashier to break a $1 bill. Attempted to call AAA on payphone located five feet from the busiest road in lower Lackawanna County.
- 4:00 PM: Begin waiting for tow truck. AAA says that it sould be there in 20-30 minutes. It begins to rain lightly.
- 4:50 PM: Truck arrives.
- 5:35 PM Luckily, we arrive at the dealer just as they were cleaning up shop for the night. Get preliminary diagnosis (timing belt), paperwork done. Called station, hoping that somebody was still there who can give me a ride back into Scrantonia. Pete graciously agrees to clear out some space in his car for me.
- 5:50 PM: Somehow remember to separate car key from rest of key ring. I usually don't remember things like that until I find myself locked out of my house at 1 AM.
- 6:30 PM: Arrive at station, proceed to do quick filler show, as I don't feel like trotting out all my usual stuff just for an hour and a half. Lots of mock-French grunting ensues.
- 8:40 PM: Arrive home, thinking that this long day was finally behind me.
- 8:41 PM: Enter house, find out that my cat had died.
I was planning on actually getting some stuff done tonight, but now I think I'll just go to bed and hope that none of this really happened.
Sunday, January 09, 2005
Non-triumphant return to the web
Well, after almost three years of not doing anything whatsoever with the website I had, I've decided to take the whole thing down and try doing just the blog thing for a while. I'm sorry to disappoint the thousands upon thousands of you who I'm sure are just biting your nails to the quick waiting for the Ashlee Simpson update to "Where Are They Now: 2010", but I'm sure you'll manage. (My prediction: she'll hack Jessica up in a jealous rage; then take her own life by bashing her face in with a brick. Her face won't look any different afterwards.) I think that when you get to the point where you don't even remember writing half of your site, it's time to let go. Although I'll definately have to bring back ScrantonCam eventually. Maybe I can turn the Mokona dress-up thing into a running gag? There's Mokona as Homsar, Mokona as Shaft, Mokona as Kurt Cobain, the list goes on. Eventually a small army of Kodansha lawyers will storm into my house and sieze everything I own, allowing me to not have to worry about a website anymore. Problem solved!
Anyway, I don't really get much time to walk around downtown Scranton randomly anymore, like I did a few years ago. So if you're perusing the archives and see those entries where I found strange things on such walks, you must be really bored. Err... I mean, there probably won't be too much of that anymore, as I am now a member of the Nation's Elite! That's right, folks, I'm one of the few, the proud, the retail workers! Expect a lot of griping about dumb customers in the future, as that's just what we do. Well, besides trying to deal with said customers without slamming them repeatedly into the endcap and screaming something like "FOR! *slam* THE! *slam* LAST! *slam* TIME! *slam* THE! *slam* VIDEO! *slam* NOW! *slam* PLAYERS! *slam* ARE! *slam* IN! *slam* TOYS! *slam* THIS! *slam* IS! *slam* ELECTRONICS! *slam* THEY! *slam* ARE! *slam* NOT! *throws customer out of dept* HERE!". This is, of course, after the customer insists for twenty minutes that they are in electronics and refuses to take no for an answer, somehow thinking that he/she knows the store better than you do, even though they needed to ask you for directions. Sometimes you wonder how these people manage to dress themselves, although many of them can't even manage that properly.
Also, I've been doing a show called "Chaos: Live!" on WUSR for the last three years. If you want to check that out, you must be really, just totally mind-numbingly bored. Err.. I mean, you can hear it on Saturdays, from 4 to 8 PM Eastern, either on 99.5 FM in the Scranton area, or via WUSR's Real or Windows Media streams. If you're so bored that you're almost suicidal, you can see my past playlists here. Mostly I play a lot of the Hipster standards, mixed in with various obscure or downright strange things that I find online or through listening to WFMU. It's college radio at its worst!
So anyway, that's pretty much it for the re-re-re-reintroduction thing. You may now safely proceed to a blog that's actually somewhat interesting. Assuming that you've actually bothered to read this far, in which case: Congratulations, you are indeed extremely bored!
Anyway, I don't really get much time to walk around downtown Scranton randomly anymore, like I did a few years ago. So if you're perusing the archives and see those entries where I found strange things on such walks, you must be really bored. Err... I mean, there probably won't be too much of that anymore, as I am now a member of the Nation's Elite! That's right, folks, I'm one of the few, the proud, the retail workers! Expect a lot of griping about dumb customers in the future, as that's just what we do. Well, besides trying to deal with said customers without slamming them repeatedly into the endcap and screaming something like "FOR! *slam* THE! *slam* LAST! *slam* TIME! *slam* THE! *slam* VIDEO! *slam* NOW! *slam* PLAYERS! *slam* ARE! *slam* IN! *slam* TOYS! *slam* THIS! *slam* IS! *slam* ELECTRONICS! *slam* THEY! *slam* ARE! *slam* NOT! *throws customer out of dept* HERE!". This is, of course, after the customer insists for twenty minutes that they are in electronics and refuses to take no for an answer, somehow thinking that he/she knows the store better than you do, even though they needed to ask you for directions. Sometimes you wonder how these people manage to dress themselves, although many of them can't even manage that properly.
Also, I've been doing a show called "Chaos: Live!" on WUSR for the last three years. If you want to check that out, you must be really, just totally mind-numbingly bored. Err.. I mean, you can hear it on Saturdays, from 4 to 8 PM Eastern, either on 99.5 FM in the Scranton area, or via WUSR's Real or Windows Media streams. If you're so bored that you're almost suicidal, you can see my past playlists here. Mostly I play a lot of the Hipster standards, mixed in with various obscure or downright strange things that I find online or through listening to WFMU. It's college radio at its worst!
So anyway, that's pretty much it for the re-re-re-reintroduction thing. You may now safely proceed to a blog that's actually somewhat interesting. Assuming that you've actually bothered to read this far, in which case: Congratulations, you are indeed extremely bored!
Saturday, October 27, 2001
AAAARRRRRRRGH!, Part II
A local radio station left a three-minute long message on my answering machine the other day. Apparently, they've been suffering from a bout of low ratings recently, and are now pulling out the desperation attempts. I predict that they will switch over to the all-"Louie Louie" format any day now, actually. So here, for your viewing enjoyment, is a transcript of the entire message, complete with commentary. Since I obviously don't want to advertise these idiots, I've changed all references to the name of the station in question to "KRAP". This name fits it perfectly, since that's all they play.
Answering Machine: *Click!* *Whirrrrrr...*
Jeff: Hi, wassup, this is Jeff.
Justin: I'm Justin.
Drew: I'm Drew.
Nick: I'm Nick.
Jeff: Hey, wassup, we're...
All: 98 Degrees!
(Because we all know that there's no better way to advertise a radio station than by having a boy band whose career ended two years ago spam answering machines across the region. Also, why is it that nobody in a boy band has ever had a last name since New Kids On The Block went belly-up? I mean, yeah, nobody cares enough about these people anyway, but still...)
Jeff: And since you're hanging out in (Struggling to read it...) Lackawanna County, we want you to do us a huge favor. We want you to listen to KRAP on XX.X and now on YY.Y. You know, it's Northeast PA's #1 Hit Music Station®. In fact, right now, KRAP is playing the most Hit™ Music for you in Lackawanna County, with 10 in a row!
(Sure, they play crappy music, but they play it in ten-song blocks, by God! How can that possibly be bad?)
Jeff: So go ahead, Lackawanna County, make the switch to KRAP on XX.X and YY.Y KRAP. Plus, don't forget to check out our good friends...
All: MUMBLEMUMBLE! And the KRAP Morning Crew©!
AJ: Thanks, guys. It's Jen and AJ from the KRAP Morning Crew© and we just want to thank you for checking us out on weekday mornings on XX.X and now on YY.Y, KRAP
(But I *didn't* check you out!)
Jen: As we begin to rebuild our Great Nation™...
(Oh yeah, as if this whole concept couldn't possibly get any cheesier, let's take advantage of the attacks for an advertising angle! Way to go, elite marketing squadrons!)
Jen: ...we want to let you know that we're going to be there for you, every step of the way.
(...Doing absolutely nothing.)
AJ: So go ahead, make the switch. Turn on XX.X and YY.Y KRAP and you'll always get ten in a row.
Jen: That's the most Hit™ Music for all of Northeast PA
(And thank God that we don't have any more than that.)
AJ: Plus, you'll always get the best concert tickets from the...
(With the acts we get in this area, the best ticket you can get is for a place somewhere far, far away from the actual concert.)
Answering Machine: BEEEEEEP! CLICK! WHIRRRRRRRR!
Machine, I have never been happier to hear that sound in my life. I feel like listening to KRZ now, just out of spite. *Tunes radio to KRZ*
*Instinctively picks up radio and flings it out the window*
Okay, maybe not.
Next week: WNEP meteorologist Joe Snedeker and MegaTokyo's Dom battle it out in a bloody stick figure fight to the death! Or maybe not...
And now, as promised last week, here's what I ate for breakfast:
AAAARRRRRRRGH!, Part I
Answering Machine: *Click!* *Whirrrrrr...*
Jeff: Hi, wassup, this is Jeff.
Justin: I'm Justin.
Drew: I'm Drew.
Nick: I'm Nick.
Jeff: Hey, wassup, we're...
All: 98 Degrees!
(Because we all know that there's no better way to advertise a radio station than by having a boy band whose career ended two years ago spam answering machines across the region. Also, why is it that nobody in a boy band has ever had a last name since New Kids On The Block went belly-up? I mean, yeah, nobody cares enough about these people anyway, but still...)
Jeff: And since you're hanging out in (Struggling to read it...) Lackawanna County, we want you to do us a huge favor. We want you to listen to KRAP on XX.X and now on YY.Y. You know, it's Northeast PA's #1 Hit Music Station®. In fact, right now, KRAP is playing the most Hit™ Music for you in Lackawanna County, with 10 in a row!
(Sure, they play crappy music, but they play it in ten-song blocks, by God! How can that possibly be bad?)
Jeff: So go ahead, Lackawanna County, make the switch to KRAP on XX.X and YY.Y KRAP. Plus, don't forget to check out our good friends...
All: MUMBLEMUMBLE! And the KRAP Morning Crew©!
AJ: Thanks, guys. It's Jen and AJ from the KRAP Morning Crew© and we just want to thank you for checking us out on weekday mornings on XX.X and now on YY.Y, KRAP
(But I *didn't* check you out!)
Jen: As we begin to rebuild our Great Nation™...
(Oh yeah, as if this whole concept couldn't possibly get any cheesier, let's take advantage of the attacks for an advertising angle! Way to go, elite marketing squadrons!)
Jen: ...we want to let you know that we're going to be there for you, every step of the way.
(...Doing absolutely nothing.)
AJ: So go ahead, make the switch. Turn on XX.X and YY.Y KRAP and you'll always get ten in a row.
Jen: That's the most Hit™ Music for all of Northeast PA
(And thank God that we don't have any more than that.)
AJ: Plus, you'll always get the best concert tickets from the...
(With the acts we get in this area, the best ticket you can get is for a place somewhere far, far away from the actual concert.)
Answering Machine: BEEEEEEP! CLICK! WHIRRRRRRRR!
Machine, I have never been happier to hear that sound in my life. I feel like listening to KRZ now, just out of spite. *Tunes radio to KRZ*
*Instinctively picks up radio and flings it out the window*
Okay, maybe not.
Next week: WNEP meteorologist Joe Snedeker and MegaTokyo's Dom battle it out in a bloody stick figure fight to the death! Or maybe not...
And now, as promised last week, here's what I ate for breakfast:
AAAARRRRRRRGH!, Part I
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