Wednesday, August 30, 2006

Luxury Condo Update

Previously, on Live from the Mai-King Chinese Restaurant...

Lone busted-up car in front of half-demolished building
May 2006

And now, our progress three months later:

Several slightly better-looking cars in front of same half-demolished building
August 2006

So, as you can see, we now have more than one car parked in front of the half-building! Better looking cars, too! Not only that, but most of them now seem to have their windows intact! Doesn't that just scream luxury? Surely, the throngs of obscenely wealthy Scrantonians are anxiously awaiting the grand opening of this fine establishment! What's that, you say?

Scranton Times-Tribune: 23% of City in Poverty! CMC to Cut 90 Jobs!
Poverty rates double the national average! Job cuts galore! Mission accomplished!

Ah, but surely you don't know about the fine business plans of these entrepreneurs:
  1. Go into a city where white-collar jobs exist only on an NBC sitcom, and build countless luxury condos and upscale boutiques such as pet "centers" that look like something Tsubaki Nekoi would be doing if the whole manga thing hadn't worked out.
  2. ?????
  3. Profit!

This is a foolproof concept! How can you plebeians possibly pan such a patently perfect plan?

Monday, August 21, 2006

And speaking of blasphemy...

I just heard "Happy Happy Joy Joy" used as the theme for a Sara Lee commercial.

My childhood is now officially ruined forever. Thanks.

Sunday, August 06, 2006

Calling a Flagrant

From the "have-to-blog-this-before-the-lawyers-kill-it" dept:

(Oops, too late.)

This is just wrong.




To the infinitieth power.

Times 2.

Seriously, folks. Do we not remember what happened when someone did this with the Powerpuff Girls? That's right, Japan actually went and made it! We really don't want such a tragic event to happen again, do we?

*Waits for coast to clear*

*Sets Frieda as new wallpaper*